The Weather

Astro Guide: May 5-9

Taurus (21 April – 21 May) You will soon take a long walk ending at the old, short pier, but this time you’ll remember to stop walking. Self-improvement initiatives bring great contentment. Gemini (22 May –…

Ideas for Novels

Certified Flan Management—When it comes to indulging in this delicious dessert, it’s best to leave things to the professionals. — Timotree Weeters, Wheatabix, WV

Inconceivable

Ave Marilla

Marilla Cuthbert is mercilessly defined in Anne of Green Gables as a tall, angular woman with narrow experience and a rigid conscience. She never married or had children of her own—an old maid in the novel’s…

The Weather

Honest and Unbiased: Kudu Coffee

Kudu Coffee Charleston, SC 5 Stars I like to refer to my failures as “brief stints”; this way my dilettantism sounds less like what it is and more like the carefully considered career moves of a…

Ideas for Novels

Hughes for Breakfast—The heroic story of a man who woke up one day and decided to eat a Sikorsky S-43. — J. B. Finns, RuPaul, MN

Ideas for Novels

Plop!—Musique Concrete meets the Nouveau Roman in a battle “al dente” that’s generis on the chop-sui. — Fred Faup, North New Portland, ME

Waterfronts

The Canals

This piece is part of Waterfronts, a series of personal essays that engage with the waterways of New York and/or Los Angeles, presented in collaboration with Underwater New York. “Tip the world over on its side, and…

Ideas for Novels

The Chicken or The Egg?—When breakfast is for dinner and you can eat pizza anytime, a man can’t hardly decide what to have for lunch anymore. — Newt “Gangrene Itch,” St. Louis, MO

The Weather

American Joyce

SCENE 1 Parking lot of a WalMart in Ypsilanti. Mouldering tires in massive piles, rusted tin cans, will-o-the-wisps. A blocklong corroded neon sign, half-buried, flickers and comes to life, reading EAT. The sign flickers, buzzes, and…