The Weather

Astro Guide: February 17-21

Aquarius (21 January – 19 February) The ice storms are over, but that doesn’t mean you’re out of the woods, Aquarius. Put on pants when you’re out in the snow this week. Just because the weather’s…

Honest and Unbiased: Fly Zone

Fly Zone Gardena, CA 4 Stars My friend Doug’s always putting these crazy activities together—water park extravaganzas… slip & slide BBQs. So when I got the group invite to a trampoline park, I wasn’t sure what…

The Struggling Humorist IV

The Struggling Humorist sat in his borrowed car outside the laundry depot and stared at the dashboard clock. The Struggling Humorist didn’t want to spend one extra second inside the laundry depot. He wanted an ejector…

You Are Not the Boss of Sharon

My editor says I should mention something here regarding the absence of the next chapter of “Morongolalia.” I have two things to say. First, I’m required to apologize. So, I’m sorry. Second, I take it back!…

Jokes For Robots, v.4.0

4.0.1 A robot programmed to sell encyclopedias stops at a farmhouse, at which he interfaces with the farmer’s wife, the farmer’s daughter, and a milking machine. As all three encounters are with organic and/or non­interfacing analog…

Astro Guide: February 10-14

Aquarius (21 January – 19 February) You’ve walked by something like a million dogs in your life, and never once has one had the decency to say hello. This is all about to change. Soon, dogs…

The Secrets to Air Travel

While waiting outside the terminal to check your bags, make conversation with the people around you. Remember, just because an adult is standing with an infant doesn’t mean he or she is their parent; the two…

Astro Guide: February 3-7

Aquarius (21 January – 19 February) A man your mom dated before she met your father will send you a letter this week, in which he suggests you meet for coffee. Your palms will sweat all…

Honest and Unbiased: Summit Coffee

Summit Coffee Davidson, NC 1 Star In college the coffee shop kitty corner to one end of campus was this place called Summit Coffee. The name was meant to warn incoming customers of the café’s overall…

Why the Long Face?

“Why so somber?” I asked “Forgive me, sir. I am ignorant of having demonstrated somberness,” he said, seeming to increase in somberness. “You weren’t exactly demonstrating signs of it, I merely surmised your somber disposition from…

Morongolalia: Tirratarratorratarratirratarratum!

Read the first six posts from the Morongolalia series.  I never understood physics. Newton’s cannonball, after being released by Maxwell’s demon, makes certain that Schrödinger’s cat’s definitely dead. Wigner’s friend buries it in the backyard under…