The Weather

Astro Guide: June 16-20

Gemini (22 May – 21 June) This week you will discover a new method of preparing your favorite sandwich. Congratulations!   Cancer (22 June – 22 July) While driving down the interstate this week, you will…

Honest and Unbiased: Sharlene’s

Sharlene’s Echo Park, LA 3 Stars I was off work last Thursday before a three-day weekend. So what did I do? Go out and drink! I’m still fairly new to this part of LA so I…

How To Spend My Book Advance*

Commission an elaborative portrait of myself in which garbage is spread across a football field in my likeness and photographed aerially from a balloon I’m riding in.   Laser hair removal package.   Custom suit jackets…

Intern Guidebook

Welcome super interns! We at BigBouncer would like to congratulate you on being accepted to the 2014 internship program. It was a tough competition. You should all be very proud of yourselves. Here’s a bit of…

Astro Guide: June 9-13

Gemini (May 22 – June 21) Home Depot Orange. Undershirt Ecru. Plum Forgot. Grew This Tomato Myself. Kid, your array of “dad hues” blew me the fuck away. Before I invest eight million dollars in this…

Awkward Moments in Western Poiesis

…Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. —from “The Road Not Taken,” by Robert Frost, 1916   ROBERT FROST’S GIRLFRIEND: Where…

Astro Guide: June 2-6

Gemini (May 22 – June 21) Your new apartment is troublingly compact—not enough room to swing a cat in! That’s a problem, Gemmy; the Hoboken Cat-Swinging semifinals are Thursday and you are way behind on your…

Astro Guide: May 26-30

Gemini (22 May – 21 June) Spring has sprung, the rose doth bloom more ruddy ‘neath the dew, and local fauns will decide you might be “one of the good ones” after all—even given That Thing…

Honest and Unbiased: Blue Metropolis Literary Festival

Blue Metropolis Literary Festival Montreal, Quebec, Canada Five Stars I was recently in Montréal for the Blue Metropolis International Literary Festival. The grand prize winner of the festival this year was the American Richard Ford, winner…

I’m Afraid this Birdhouse is a Metaphor

When you sign up for a woodworking class, you don’t expect it to be much more than the advertised four-­hour class; I just wanted to meet some people and take a break from working on my…

Show Him What He Lost by Losing

Breakups can be rough. Although no one here at Lip Service Magazine has ever been dumped, we’ve witnessed the pain it causes others in countless films and T.V. shows. Handle a breakup however works for you,…