The Weather

Astro Guide: June 23-27

Cancer (22 June – 22 July) You feel like a fraud at work. But do not lose confidence, Cancer! As long as you keep showing up to the office and pretending you work there, soon you…

Astro Guide: June 16-20

Gemini (22 May – 21 June) This week you will discover a new method of preparing your favorite sandwich. Congratulations!   Cancer (22 June – 22 July) While driving down the interstate this week, you will…

Honest and Unbiased: Sharlene’s

Sharlene’s Echo Park, LA 3 Stars I was off work last Thursday before a three-day weekend. So what did I do? Go out and drink! I’m still fairly new to this part of LA so I…

How To Spend My Book Advance*

Commission an elaborative portrait of myself in which garbage is spread across a football field in my likeness and photographed aerially from a balloon I’m riding in.   Laser hair removal package.   Custom suit jackets…

Intern Guidebook

Welcome super interns! We at BigBouncer would like to congratulate you on being accepted to the 2014 internship program. It was a tough competition. You should all be very proud of yourselves. Here’s a bit of…

Astro Guide: June 9-13

Gemini (May 22 – June 21) Home Depot Orange. Undershirt Ecru. Plum Forgot. Grew This Tomato Myself. Kid, your array of “dad hues” blew me the fuck away. Before I invest eight million dollars in this…

Awkward Moments in Western Poiesis

…Two roads diverged in a wood, and I— I took the one less traveled by, And that has made all the difference. —from “The Road Not Taken,” by Robert Frost, 1916   ROBERT FROST’S GIRLFRIEND: Where…

Astro Guide: June 2-6

Gemini (May 22 – June 21) Your new apartment is troublingly compact—not enough room to swing a cat in! That’s a problem, Gemmy; the Hoboken Cat-Swinging semifinals are Thursday and you are way behind on your…