The Weather

Classic Poems, As Written by the Wait Wait…Don’t Tell Me! Limerick-Writer

You’re wondering what I have done
The fruit in the fridge, it is gone
So cold and delicious
It wasn’t malicious
I was hankering, dear, for a _________.
(Answer: plum)

I’m sighing and feeling some stress
For consequences I can’t guess
My friends can all laugh
On their easy path
While I took the road traveled ________.
(Answer: less)

Let’s face it: you make me unhappy
I hate when your specter comes at me
Such cruelty and loss
Like the Holocaust
Makes me wish that you were not my _________.
(Answer: daddy)

Decay and old age are a bummer
And you, my boy, aren’t getting younger
My ink and their lines
Keep you looking fine
Finer than a day in the __________.
(Answer: summer)

Equal treatment is truly preferred
But what if it doesn’t occur?
It’s sweet and it’s sour
A keg of gunpowder
Watch out when a dream gets ___________.
(Answer: deferred)

I’m stuck in the crowded metro
These faces are freaky — like, woah!
This surreal apparition
Makes me that this is
Like petals on a wet, black __________.
(Answer: bough)

The world sure has gone to the pits
The centre can’t hold worth a shit
A slouching man-lion!
Gee, what’s the use tryin’?
These times are the ____________.
(Answer: Apocalypse)

Thomas Scott lives in Winchester, Virginia.