From the archives

Pop Culture

Reading Katy Perry

At the dinner table, my four-year-old girl sings out: “There’s a stranger in my bed! There’s a pounding in my head! Last Friday night!” And I am so busted. “Oh, we don’t listen to that song…

Milo and Fairfax

Ghouls

“Can you narrow it down a little bit?” I sighed. “Hooded black robe, carrying a Book of Forbidden Magic, scurried into this pub. Looked like a cultist.” “This is Transylvania Prime. Do you have any idea…

The Weather

Why-to Have a Child

*why-to: a short and helpful guide to motivate one’s pursuit of activities either a.) previously not pursued or b.) pursued so regularly that no one knows or remembers why they’re doing them in the first place.…

Milo and Fairfax

The Train

I found the train’s porter in the dining car, industriously polishing the long wood bar. It was a gremlin, a small humanoid amphibian with huge ears and bright green eyes with slit pupils. They’re passive-aggressive, ill-mannered…

Transmissions

A Clockwork Trump

As given to Bruce Bauman by Zed Cone* Last night around 2 AM I was working on a new music review—OK, I was really reading the sports pages when this popped up on my screen: “Please…

Milo and Fairfax

Regulated Ink

Dire Watchword moved his mouth in something approximating a smile when I walked through the door of his tattoo parlor. It was a learned behavior—werewolves don’t really understand why baring their teeth is supposed to put…

Himalayan Love Stories

Splash Mountain

To me, watersports is one of the most erotic things I can think of. Think about it. Whether you’re a voluptuous woman or hardbodied man, there’s nothing quite like the liquid sheen of water to bring…

Tonight's Feature

VX

We were the leaders of a secret association of Bob Dylan fans, living exclusively in a Boles Aero, where bells of iron, brass, and silver along the walnut ceiling would tinkle, tinkle, tinkle. Below this gentle…

Milo and Fairfax

Middle of Nowhere

The delicate crimson filigree that covered the left side of the surgeon’s face had been etched into her skin with techno-organic bacteria and edged with liquefied rubies. It was a physician’s glyph, a highly specialized magical…

The Weather

Welcome to Donald’s Platinum

Is your local McDonald’s suddenly a cultural melting pot? Nowadays, it feels like a hard working American can’t even get an old-fashioned burger, what with all the wasabi-ginger salads and burrito wraps behind the counter. Sure,…

The Weather

Alchemy

Hey Sara! Sorry I’m late. You look great. What smell? Oh that’s probably sulfur from all the alchemy I’ve been getting into. I hardly even notice it any more. Oh no, if anything, alchemy is bigger…